I LOVE SWEEETSS;

2010-11-12T23:01:00.001+08:00

Heart speaks first

Standing on the other side of the road
With a tear in your eyes
Wishing that I didn't act the way I do
Took it too far this time
I was filled with emotion
Instead of giving you space,I threw it in your face
And now, you just wanted me closer
But I pushed you away
I made you scream,I made you cry
I shouldn't have taken the stars from your sky
We're still a team,as much as it hurts
Remember that they're only words
My heart speaks first
So baby whenever it hurts
Remember that they're only words
My heart speaks first
Its hard for me to function when I know your sad
Like a robot in rain
And even though the hurt you feel is all my bad
It still drives me insane(its making me crazy)
And you know that I love you
That I need you to be there, like a table needs chairs
But love, after all that we've been through
Please don't let it all slip away
I made you scream,I made you cry
I shouldn't have taken the stars from your sky
We're still a team,as much as it hurts
Remember that they're only words
My heart speaks first
So baby whenever it hurts
Remember that they're only words
My heart speaks first
And its teling me to,and its telling me to love you(love you)
And its teling me to,and its telling me to love you(love you)
I made you scream,I made you cry
I shouldn't have taken the stars from your sky
We're still a team,as much as it hurts
Remember that they're only words
My heart speaks first
So baby whenever it hurts
Remember that they're only words,remember that they're only words
My heart speaks first

2010-06-14T21:45:00.002+08:00

HI! I'M BACK! from NOWHERE!

hahahaha! crazy me.

<3 looking back at my past posts and smiling to myself.
man man, it's really time to move on.

but on some things, it's jus difficult to let go, isn't?

HELLO FRIENDS! IT'S GSS! SHOPPING, ANYONE? ((:

2010-03-14T19:23:00.002+08:00

It's been a while since I really had fun outdoor.. Since N year I think. haha.

Had OVB outing today, at Escape theme park.

The place wasn't really fantastic, but at least it is equipped with pirate ship, mini roller coaster(?), wet and wild (I LIKE!!), etc.
Personally, I prefer the 'wet and wild' the most. It's the一时快感why I likes it so much ba. haha..
Pirate ship is exciting, but too exciting for my weak heart. haha. 我会晕船 :/

Though the place was average, but it's the people whose with me that made my day today :D

Chonglei! My sunburn is coming out le! X( Boohoo, it's so warm.

EX-OVBs,
这段日子
谢谢你们的陪伴
陪我一起
奋斗过
争吵过
开心过
担心过
谢谢你们对我的包容
对我的谅解

希望我们的友谊不会到此为此
希望十年后，还能一起吃饭、聊天、开彼此的玩笑

***

On my way home, I couldn't help but msg him.
I just wants to make sure that he's taking care of himself,
to know that he's alright,
to know that he's happy.

***

I appreciate you wanting to send me home, but i guess it's time for me to get used of walking home alone.
I believe it's just my habit, my bad habit :(

2010-03-13T20:25:00.003+08:00

Long long ago...long long ago...

It's really been a LONG LONG ago since I've updated.
Many things just... shum shum shum.. and flew past.

Currently, I'm already waiting to be graduate in May, and a relief teacher in a student care centre and a Kindergarden.
Gotta say being a relief teacher there is really a different experience, where i've to handle things and students that i've nv touched before.
Tired? Who's isn't when it comes to work...
Haven't been so tired ever since I left OurVoiceBox.sg. Both physically and mentally. *叹*
But it's fun lo.. don't know in which way. but it's different from the things i'm used of handling. haaha.

The world will never stop revolving for someone, and things are forever changing.
Perhaps, we aren't the same anymore.

2010-01-01T12:04:00.003+08:00

Happy new year to all!

Starting 2010 with 'AVATAR' gets people thinking..

feeling the connections.

the network.

the PEOPLE.

2009-12-21T10:03:00.005+08:00

四年半，长吗？
说长不长，说短不短。
老实说，我们彼此都没有发现时间一点一滴地流逝，
就像我们的感情一样。

你我都累了吧。

爱情，这个虚无飘渺的东西。
为它伤心伤身伤神，划得来吗？

这是一场爱情的游戏，
哭过，笑过，吵过，烦过。

这场爱情游戏，
我输了。
输在太习惯，
输在太投入，
输在太专制，
输得太惨不忍睹了。

这场爱情游戏，
我变得太依赖，
依恋你的陪伴，
但到这一天，
我才觉悟到，
原来，
投入的只有我一人，
而我在你身边，却可有可无！

也许，
对你而言，
这只不过是场游戏罢了。

在面具后的我，只想用沉默，
把一切给封起来，
让一切成为过去，
沉默…沉默…

2009-12-10T15:20:00.000+08:00

哭过就好了

梁文音

不喜欢怀疑什麽
并不表示我没有感受
看你微妙的变化慢慢不同
我不是生气只是心痛
最讨厌被误会了
但越解释越觉得难过
你可以说人会变
但不能说你会这麽做是我的错
哭过就好了
伤都会好的
这样相信所以深呼吸著割舍
爱是为了拥抱为了牵手
不是为了争吵为了调头
哭过就好了
痛都会走的
记忆有限所以它会淘汰坏的
失眠听歌想念虽然苦涩
还是谢谢你让我长大了
哭过就好了
痛都会走的
记忆有限所以它会淘汰坏的
失眠听歌想念虽然苦涩
还是谢谢你让我长大了
越多美好堆叠的过往
想忘就得推倒更大的悲伤
要找勇气却不在口袋或手上
但它一定在我身上某个地方
哭过就好了
痛都会走的
记忆有限所以它会淘汰坏的
失眠听歌想念虽然苦涩
还是谢谢你让我长大了

2009-12-08T22:01:00.002+08:00

责任感是什么？
责任感值多少钱？
为什么人一定要有责任感？

如果没有，是不是会过得更好？
如果没有，现在是不是没这么烦？
如果没有，还算是人吗？

13周，“虚”的一声就这样地飞过了。
看到目前的这种情况，我开始慌了。
这是我在这里的最后一程，
不愿意也不想败在这里。

别人怎么样我无权过问，
但是我不会让自己倒在这最后一程上。

跑了
跌了
拼了

最后结果如何？

2009-11-24T16:31:00.002+08:00

HAPPY BELATED BIRTHDAY TO CANDY LEI!
HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO COUSIN KWANG!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU
HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU
HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU-TWO
HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU! (:

2009-11-13T22:09:00.004+08:00

How does it feels like to be on top of the world?
I don't know.

But I know, the higher you are, the more pain you'll feel when you fall.

Standing on top of a mountain, does it makes you on top of the world?
No, it makes you feel how small and how insignificant you are on Earth.

Why do people always want to get to the top of the world?
Top of the world, where is that? How can people get there?
I don't know.

Do you?

2009-11-11T12:34:00.003+08:00

内伤……再不把它吐出来，真的会憋出内伤来

当初，你说，只要我在时间内把它写完，就能用。
现在，你说，人家的比较深入，他们又得罪不起，所以就牺牲我的完成他们的。

原来，一切只能怪我太傻、太天真，一厢情愿地相信你的话，才会如此。
原来，东西可以乱吃，话真的不可乱讲。

既然打从一开始一切不会是公平的，那我再怎么努力，到头来也只能是这样。

好自为之吧！

2009-11-02T13:35:00.001+08:00

二零零九年五月二十九日，我‘征服’了庐山。

庐山就像是一位戴着面纱的美人，那么美丽动人却又遥不可及。只有真的到了庐山，才能体会到“不知庐山真面目，只缘身在此山中”这句话的意义。庐山为中国保存第四纪冰川遗迹较为典型、集中的一座山体，为地堑式断块山，多险绝胜景。中国历代许多诗人、学者、名流——如李白、杜甫、白居易、岳飞等都曾到此游历或隐居，因而留下了大量的吟颂庐山的诗文和诗刻。所以，庐山不像武当山具有壮观雄伟的景色，而是以文化闻名的一座山。

在五月二十九日这一天，我们一群人浩浩荡荡地来到这座位于中国江西省九江市的庐山。现在回想起来，以一句话来概括最深刻的、最难忘的：走了很多路，流了很多汗水，看了很多东西，想了很多事情，但一切似乎太像一场梦了。

有人说女人都是善变的，特别是美丽的女人。庐山‘这位戴着面纱的美人’上的天气也不例外。不知是我们走运还是倒霉，就在我们前往仙人洞时，不知从何处吹来一阵雾，把我们给包围住了。顿时，我们就像走在梦境中，大家似乎都像神仙般一样驾云在空中飘，十分梦幻。现实始终是现实，我们没飘起来。

放眼看去，一片白茫茫，怎么样也看不出庐山哪里美，就算到了五老峰也如此。可是回到了宾馆，静下心回想的时候才发现，庐山的美是必须用心去体会，而不是用世俗的肉眼来观看的。就如站在险峰边，脚下白茫茫的一片，什么也看不见。它没有让我感到自己在顶峰而能把世界踩在脚底的感觉，也没有扩大我的自大。相反地，它让我感到自己的渺小——在这山峰中一个渺小的个体。从这个角度想，既然自己的如此的渺小，那就算有什么烦恼又如何。与这些高大的山、广阔的天比较，这些烦恼也就是那么微不足道，根本不必挂在心上。在险峰边望着那一望无际的白茫茫的一片，不仅给人一种朦胧美，也难得让我感到那种与世隔绝、与世无争的平静。但是现实始终是现实，脑后的那片买卖喧嚷顿时把我拉回了这个充满烦恼的现实中。

庐山在十九世纪末二十世纪初就出现了英、俄、美、法等18个国家风格的别墅近千幢，代表着西方文化侵入中国的大趋势。刚好我们这次住的“庐池宾馆”就是当时留下来的别墅改为宾馆招待外地来的客人。对于这次在庐山上过夜我已经把最坏的情况想象出来了。但出乎我所料，与我最坏的想像相比，“庐池宾馆”还真不错。走进这外表看似有点简陋的古曲欧式别墅，里头却像麻雀的五脏——虽小却俱全。离海拔这么高的地方竟然还有烧水使用，我们的确是应该知足的。可是耳边为什么还会时不时传来一些扰人的意见呢？反驳的话刚到嘴边，却硬生生地又把它吞下。也许是因为不同的人有不一样的经历吧，何必因为一时的冲动而伤了和气呢？也许是自己曾经历过比这些还差得条件，所以才觉得这已经很好了。也许是他人并没做好心理准备来面对这些，才会有如此大的反应。无论如何，还是等进入了梦乡，遇到周公后才与他辩论吧。毕竟现实与梦境是不同的。在梦中，人们能畅所欲言、能自由地胡思乱想乱说，但是在现实生活中，人们必须遵守许多人文条规，而这些人文条规不仅繁琐，还约束着人们的一举一动。现实总归还是现实，通过这些人文规矩把我们这些生存在现实中的小人物牢牢地铐住，让我们动弹不得。

在庐山，不仅树多、新鲜空气多，楼梯也很多。我们这次“庐山三日游”最大的挑战就是三叠泉的楼梯。对我们这些年轻的‘草莓族’而言，这些楼梯真是陡得可怕，又多得让人数不清。多亏老师和导游的细心安排，只让我们从上往下走，直到三叠泉，休息片刻后再从那里继续走到庐山脚下。就算只往下走，走下那些又长又陡的阶梯一点也不是件容易的事。在中途休息时，虽然站在一处不动，但自己的小腿却不由自主地在跳舞，真是一种另类的感受。往下走时，看到那些扛着一袋袋看似很重袋子的老伯，努力地往上爬。这时，我心中突然对这些住在山中的老人肃然起敬，不仅敬佩他们的耐力与体力，也为不争气的自己感到惭愧。

虽然我们这群‘草莓族’到三叠泉时已经累得快瘫在地上了，但是见到这瀑布的奇观，我们似乎又奇迹般地活过来了，还能忙着拿起相机乱拍照。三叠泉，又被称为三级泉，在庐山东谷会仙亭旁。这巨大的瀑布总落差达300米，以一瀑激石成为三叠而得名。三叠泉的附近有铁壁峰岩石黑中带赤，层层堆积而成，是庐山唯一的岩层奇景。三叠泉一点也不壮观，因为它给我的感觉是美丽多过于雄伟，含蓄多过于霸气。它就像是一位坚强独立的小女生，为了自己的生存而在这艰辛的环境下战斗着。它就是那众多高山中的一个小点缀，让这群高山中多了一份娇柔，为这位‘带着面纱的美人’多了一份美感。

曲终人散，天底下没有不散的宴席，我们终于踏上回武汉的路。当旅游巴缓缓地驶进华师的大门，我们不禁欢呼：“回家了！”。虽然来到武汉就是那短短的几个月的时间，但武汉华师为‘我的家’的这个概念却在不知不觉地情况下形成了。在离开武汉到庐山游玩的三天，我想家了。这个陌生的环境已成为我生活中的一部分，宿舍也已成为我遇到阻碍时可以依赖和寄托身心的避风港。对于刚开始来到武汉生活四个半月还有点排斥的我，现在回到这里的感觉还真妙。

“庐山三日游”就像梦一般地过去了。我们这群“草莓”在老师和导游们‘赶羊式’的照顾和呵护下，终于舒舒服服地‘征服’了庐山。我们走完和爬完那些看似永无止尽的路和楼梯，现在回想起来却觉得没什么，毕竟我们还是这样走过来了。现在梦醒了，但人还是得继续走完接下来的路，不是吗？

2009-10-14T09:07:00.001+08:00

Life is short
Break the rules
forgive quickly
kiss passionately, love truly
laugh constantly
And never stop smiling
no matter how strange life is
Life is not always the party we expected to be
but as long as we are here, we should smile and be grateful.

2009-10-09T10:03:00.000+08:00

2009-10-07T13:55:00.002+08:00

Calling out to all!
Please help me to do this survey.
Your response is very important to OurVoiceBox.sg(OVB).

Click Here to take survey

2009-10-01T10:22:00.003+08:00

一天，有两个小孩子在上学的路上找到一个盒子，一个看似普通、不起眼、四四方方的音乐盒。

身为两个好奇的小孩，不管三七二十一，就把盒子打开了。这个看似普普通通的盒子竟然会发出音乐！虽然听来听去就只有那个曲调，但是这两个好奇的小朋友却对这个看似不起眼的音乐盒爱不释手。

孩子就是孩子，看到喜欢的东西就想占为己有，一点也没有share的精神，很糟糕。

孩子甲：“这是我的！是我的音乐盒子！”
孩子乙：“不！这是我先找到的！你为什么要抢我的音乐盒子？是我的音乐盒！”
孩子甲：“可是可是……”

看似抢不过人的孩子甲马上眼眶翻红，嘴也嘟得高高的，就快哭出来时，有另一个年纪比较大的哥哥冲忙地走过来说："这是我的音乐盒，谢谢你们找到了它。"说着，取了孩子乙手上的音乐盒，转身就走了。

结果，这两个小孩不仅没了音乐盒，也失去了彼此的友情。

2009-09-28T20:51:00.003+08:00

因为害怕所以掩饰
因为寂寞所以假装
因为快乐所以欺骗
因为生活所以演出

生活成这样真的能算活着吗？

也许因为害怕失去所以拼命把情绪埋起来
也许因为把情绪埋得太久所以当爆发时非常可怕
也许因为爆发时的恐怖所以一切将不可收拾

因为或许有可能我不知道
因为或许有可能我的一句不知道让我把一切推得干干净净

2009-09-28T16:08:00.000+08:00

是不是说了对不起就应该得到原谅？

2009-09-25T19:35:00.004+08:00

原来，只要我不笑，就不是正常的我了。
原来，无论发生什么事，我还是得把笑容挂在脸上。
原来，我不能把面具摘下来。

也许，今天是星期五。
也许，我太想他（们）了。
也许，我累了，只想要个休息的时间。

似乎开不完的会议，
写不完的计划书，
说不完的话题，

真的可以平平安安、快快乐乐地度过在义安的最后几个月吗？

我不知道，却想知道。

2009-09-24T08:57:00.002+08:00

憋了这么多天的天空，今天终于劈里啪啦地下起了大雨，刮起大风。
憋了这么多天的心情，今天也似乎有点解放。

辛苦吗？累吗？后悔了吗？又怎么样？
现在只能说，既然这是自己选择的那条路，就应该把它走完，而不应该浪费时间在思考这种后不后悔的问题吧。

今天，'拉拉虫'又找上我了。
痛苦。 >.<

2009-09-20T22:44:00.002+08:00

Distance doesn't really matter, it's taking the effort to take the first step that's so difficult.

2009-09-15T09:21:00.002+08:00

9月14日

今天是我们正式接管OurVoiceBox.sg的大日子。

“大吉大利！开工大吉！财源滚滚来……？”

听起来有点老套，听起来有点俗，又怎么样？也许我们现在最需要的就是这种庇佑，让我们顺顺利利、平平安安地度过这五个月（或不止）。像“大吉大利”这种喊话，都是那些祖先、祖先的祖先、祖先的祖先的祖先……留下来的。虽然这些话喊给自己听的成分似乎较大，就像是通过那一丁点来鼓励着自己，通过那一丁点来推动着自己的意识，但又怎么样？既然是很久很久以前流传下来的，就必定有它存在的道理和原因。这些喊话真的有用也好，没有也罢，就当是安慰自己吧。

2009-09-12T00:33:00.002+08:00

Haven't been updating much this week. This is only the first week of OVB and there I have, two outstanding panda eyes on my face. Incredible.

Gemini: Daily Horoscope. Friday, Sept 11, 2009

The ability to learn allows you to change. Flow with it, change is good as long as you learn to transform with it. This is a time for you to learn, so study the lessons well and positive changes will come. Learn to adapt and the world will modify you for the better.
-from horoscope.com

I think that's something i really need now.
Ability to learn allows me to change. I need to learn to adapt.

2009-09-05T17:54:00.001+08:00

"笑一个，该离开的，就洒脱离开；该握别的，就好好握别。"
-Quoted from Lee LaoShi's blog.

2009-09-04T20:17:00.002+08:00

照片真是些奇妙的东西。

以前的我自认洒脱，觉得世上的很多事都是身外之物。无论是友情、爱情、亲情等等，当死去的时候，都会化为乌有。但是我却忽略了我仍然活在这个世界上，而就是有了友情、爱情、亲情给予的温暖、精神上的扶持，我才能走到这步。（说也很奇怪，我竟然能忽略我还活着。）

几个月前，我就是望着笔记电脑桌面的全家福而撑过了四个半月。
四个半月就这样过去了，而我就通过那张“临时”拍的全家福熬过去了。这张“临时”拍的全家福，没有专业的灯光、没有华丽的服装，但我却依赖它、对着它流泪、靠它给予的那一丝丝温暖，过了一个难忘的四个半月。

几个月后，我坐在那撩乱的“烤箱”里，在白色书桌前，敲打着键盘。在电脑中，不经意开到我们在中国，武汉所拍的照片的档案。看着看着，自己的脸上既然划过一道笑容。虽然这四个半月很难熬，想家想得快疯了，开始讨厌什么都得靠自己，发生一些让我措手不及、烦躁的事情，但不可否认的，这四个半月仍然在我心中留下了不可磨灭的影子。
那让我们这盘散沙团结起来的北京烤鸭，那把我们累得美得呱呱叫的庐山，那在高速公路上发生车祸的三峡之旅等等，那集聚了国际学生的国际学生宿舍，那楼梯似乎爬不完的教学楼，那些被我们搞得哭笑不得的亲爱的老师，那些把我们搞得哭笑不得的可爱老师，那对我们照顾有加的阿姨们，那个虽然不起眼但都让我们着迷他炒饭的路边摊，那我最后竟然没吃到的博雅园！哈哈...那让我们疯狂的钱柜，那让我疯狂的breezer派对，那人来人往的群光，那惹祸的“星巴克”，那把我的胃宠坏的"crush it"，那充满情感的1301，那，那和那。对，我在怀旧...
人不是常说吗？人就是这样，失去了才会珍惜，没了才会哭。而我就是这种人。
友情、爱情、亲情也是如此，失去了我才会痛，不在了才懂得珍惜。

一种循环，恶劣的循环。

就是那几张照片，揭露了这种人性的丑恶，
也揭露我的这种人性。

:)

想在这里感谢这群陪我度过这四个半月的朋友们。
ONGZHIHUI, 小白Singyee, 高贵Wanyan, 色偶像Chonglei, 无厘头CS, 恐龙Jinyu, Starbucks Qianqian, Hungry Huiwen, 秀秀Xiumin, 熊猫Shinru, 性感Jana, 装无辜YIQI, 真无辜Vina
和
所有在这四个半月参与我生活的人们。

2009-09-03T06:47:00.001+08:00

Gemini: Daily Horoscope
Thursday, 3Sept, 2009.
"You may have a lot of possibility heading your way, so just make sure that you don't talk yourself out something good. Smart questions give you a deeper understanding of what you need to learn, but too many questions just make everything more confusing."
Taken from: www.horoscope.com

I guess I just have to simplify everything?

2009-08-31T22:56:00.000+08:00

"Actually all kinds of relationships is like holding sand on your palm. If you hold on tightly to it, it'll escape through your fingers; but if you just hold the sand on your palm and let it have freedom, it'll forever be yours."
--By the tiny wise one.

It sounds logical, right?
Right!
But how often can one really reach that stage? For now, I'm still learning.
What about you?

:)

2009-08-31T21:57:00.001+08:00

有时事实就是那么地简单易懂，
过去的就该让它过去。
但是我放不下，
是我把那么简单易懂的事实搞得复杂难懂。

怪谁？
还能怪谁？
到头来只有自己在痛苦...

你曾说我对一切很冷淡，
你也曾说我不在乎我们之间的所有。

但我只想对你说，
也许是因为我害怕被抛弃，所以我选择先放手。
也许是我们之间还没有完完全全的了解，不能完全地释怀。
也许那次的伤害仍然存在我们的心中，谁没原谅谁，谁还在误会谁。
也许是因为我们对某样事有着不同的态度吧！
也许...
也许...
也许这一切只是我的借口。

现在，你们对我的冷淡，
我也只能一笑置之。
也许或许有可能，
这对我们都好。

2009-08-28T19:53:00.003+08:00

当在人生中遇到不顺心的时候，该怎么办呢？
旁人总会说，除了接受，接受，还是接受。（没错，我就属于这类人。）
既然这个事实已成定局，我们还能扭曲这个铁定的事实吗？
显然的，我们不能。
既然不能，为何不尝试接受、面对它？
也许听起来很虚伪、很做作，但除了这样，也没有其他的办法了吧。

当不幸的事发生在自己的身上时，就会开始钻牛角尖，陷入“十万个为什么”之中，觉得这世界上没人懂自己，觉得自己万分可怜。
“为什么这会发生在自己的身上？
为什么他能，我却不能？
明明一切都很好，为什么还是这样？
你不懂我，别在这里说风凉话...”

世上万万无绝对，不幸的事不会只专挑发生在你身上，任何人都有倒霉的时候，都有失落的时刻。每个人都曾跌到过，但最重要的是如何在跌倒处从新爬起来，是不？

在这个特别的时候，似乎多了更多失落的影子。
影子们，
不管结局如何，
希望大家最终能看得开，
接受得到的结局，
为自己展开另一张灿烂的篇幅。

为自己的未来加油吧！

:)

"Whenever you got angry for a minute, you lost 60 seconds of happiness..."

2009-08-28T00:44:00.014+08:00

Did you guys enjoyed yourselves today?
Well, I guess I did. :)
Hmms, Pretty sure i did.

Bee's darling, I was wrong to say u 'gam' never bathe. I'm pretty sure you did bathe, and becos you did, the rain siam-ed you! and thus, it made our day. :) Lol. thanks la!

T02 T02,
You've walked so far,
So fast.
2and1/2 years,
flew past just like that.

Pretty soon,
We'll be moving on,
into our own future.
In the coming future,
Will there still be a day,
where we'll still gather together,
bringing our own food,
sitting together,
talking and laughing out loud, like now.
will we still crack our brains,
getting sand-ed and tired,
just to get those photos? :)

Perhaps,
Let's just leave e answers for future to answer,
just enjoy, treasure and cherish the time when we still could ba.
Isn't? :)

4july2010,
Is our date still on?
Will you still remember me?

Tears and laughter,
Pains and gains,
Losing and winning,
Are all part and parcel of my life.
It's my life,
but will you play a part in it?

Thank you for those who made today a success. :) Everything's really great!

2009-08-11T11:01:00.000+08:00

群众要求，我又回来了！
说真的，自从从中国回来后，真的没什么好写的。日子一天天这样过，也已成为一种日常例行。
现在的自己，抱着矛盾的心情，等待着生活新篇章的开始。

2009-07-15T11:17:00.002+08:00

Right, I'm back in Sg.

面对这熟悉的一切，又有一种陌生的感觉。
也许是这一切变了，也许是我变了吧。
四个半月说长不长，说短不短，而时间一旦流失了就找不回来了。
感觉也是如此，不是吗？

2009-06-14T09:21:00.000+08:00

MY NEW YEAR'S RESOLUTION FOR 2010:
Get Organized.

2009-06-11T20:26:00.000+08:00

A boy was born to a couple after eleven years of marriage. They were a loving couple and the boy was the gem of their eyes. When the boy was around two years old, one morning the husband saw a medicine bottle open. He was late for office so he asked his wife to cap the bottle and keep it in the cupboard. His wife, preoccupied in the kitchen totally forgot the matter.

The boy saw the bottle and playfully went to the bottle fascinated by its color and drank it all. It happened to be a poisonous medicine meant for adults in small dosages. When the child collapsed the mother hurried him to the hospital, where he died.

The mother was stunned. She was terrified how to face her husband. When the distraught father came to the hospital and saw the dead child, he looked at his wife and uttered just five words.

1. What were the five words?
2. What is the implication of this story?

The husband just said, "I am with you Darling."
The husband's totally unexpected reaction is a pro-active behavior. The child is dead. He can never be brought back to life.. There is no point in finding fault with the mother. Besides, if only he had taken time to keep the bottle away, this would not have happened. No one is to be blamed. She had also lost her only child. What she needed at that moment was consolation and sympathy from the husband. That is what he gave her. If everyone can look at life with this kind of perspective, there would be much fewer problems in the world.

MORAL OF THE STORY:
Sometimes we spend time in asking who is responsible or whom to blame, whether in a relationship, in a job or with the people we know. By this we miss out on so much warmth in human relationships.

2009-05-27T12:45:00.000+08:00

你让他用戒指把你套上的时候
我察觉到你脸上复杂的笑容
那原本该是我
付予你的承诺
现在我只能隐身热闹中
我跟着所有人向你祝贺的时候
只有你知道我多喝了几杯酒
我不能再看你
多一眼都是痛
即使知道暗地里你又回头
我终于知道曲终人散的寂寞
只有伤心人才有
你最后一身红残留在我眼中
我没有再依恋的借口
原来这就是曲终人散的寂寞
我还想等你什么
你紧紧拉住我衣袖
又放开让我走
这一次跟我彻底分手

谢谢你这三年多的时间。
现在的我，已经没有依恋的借口了。

2009-05-23T11:19:00.000+08:00

My Spirit Animal?
As a Crow, you are analytical, adaptable, and exceedingly clever. You like solving problems, sharing a hearty laugh with friends, and most of all, enjoying a good meal. Your inquisitive, philosophical nature leads you to constantly question authority and the status quo, sometimes just for the sake of asking, "Why?"

How true is that? I don't really like crows.

2009-05-19T20:59:00.001+08:00

It's just another day of taszemian having her 'bad-temper' day.
Perhaps it's PMS.
Maybe?
Could be.
Lols.

Like what singyee and jinyu said, bad things are not meant to be remembered.
Ok, I edited it, but they said something that meant that. You get what I mean. Rights.

Anyway, thanks to sly that I'm able to blog again.
46moredays to go. Can't wait to be home.

2009-05-13T21:30:00.003+08:00

Yay! 51moredays!
thanks bffl for counting down for me :) <33
I think i'll be happier tmr.
Becos it means it'll only be 50days left before I'm back in Singapore.

Striked国际商务沟通呈现off my HOMEWORK LIST!
Hurray! :)
Tmr there will be a 国学典籍期中考试.
After tomorrow, I'll be a happier TASZEMIAN.

国学典籍期中考试was supposed to be a closed book test, but our class fight for our rights! :)
We managed to get it to a open book test, many thanks to Aaron's well written letter.
Hope for end of the sem papers, there'll be more open book papers!
Lols.
Greedy me, 可是是人都是贪得无厌的吧。

One word to describe the following weeks: Hectic.
I SHOULD be busy rushing my assignments, essay or projects.
by hook or by crook, I've to survive the next 3weeks. And I will.
Let's jiayou tgt people! :D

Sigh, really missed Sg's food and people. Can't wait to be back. <33
Miss you guys back there.

2009-05-10T10:12:00.002+08:00

WestLife - Swear It Again

I wanna know
Who ever told you I was letting go
Of the only joy that I have ever known
Girl, they're lying

Just look around
And all of the people that we used to know
Have just given up, they wanna let it go
But we're still trying

So you should know this love we share was never made to die
I'm glad we're on this one way street just you and I
Just you and I

Chorus:
I'm never gonna say goodbye
Cos I never wanna see you cry
I swore to you my love would remain
And I swear it all over again and I
I'm never gonna treat you bad
Cos I never wanna see you sad
I swore to share your joy and your pain
And I swear it all over again

All over again

Some people say
That everything has got its place in time
Even the day must give way to the night
But I'm not buying
Cos in your eyes
I see a love that burns eternally
And if you see how beautiful you are to me
You'll know I'm not lying

Sure there'll be times we wanna say goodbye
But even if we try
There are something's in this life won't be denied
Won't be denied

Chorus

The more I know of you is the more I know I love you
And the more that I'm sure I want you forever and ever more
The more that you love me, the more that I know
Oh that I'm never gonna let you go
Gotta let you know that I

Chorus

2009-05-06T20:29:00.025+08:00

妈妈来了，又走了。
9天一转眼就这样地过去了。今天带着满怀的不舍，送妈妈上计程车，还没等计程车离去我就急忙转头就走了。随着加快的脚步，我眼眶已被泪水给模糊了，根本看不清去路。但心中一直念着：“不行，不能让妈妈看到我哭。这样妈妈也会伤心的。”妈妈到武汉的第一天就一直嘱咐我：“我回新加坡的时候不要看到你哭啊！你应该感到开心、幸福、庆幸。因为妈妈飞了几千里来看你了。”是啊！妈妈来到这里的9天，我是那么的幸福，那么的快乐，也吃了许多好吃的，又玩了黄鹤楼、武当山，我还有什么该奢求的？所以我强忍着泪，加快地走回宿舍，在路上买了一杯奶昔，算是安慰自己吧。（还真有用！）
就这样，接下来的两个月，我又是自己一人了。
还有58天，思敏加油吧！

也许在朋友面前仍然安然无恙的自己，
还能在朋友面前强颜欢笑的自己，
也不过如此而已。
最后当独自一人时，还是阻挡不了思念家的感觉，
阻挡不了涌出来的泪水。

28/05
妈妈安全地抵达武汉。
聪明的妈妈不知怎么了找到从机场到武汉的巴士。就这样，妈妈没达计程车，以又省钱又安全的方式，在晚上7点多时，就到了名*商务酒店。那晚好像太晚了，附近没什么能吃的，就带妈妈到附近的群光广场吃Ajisen，感觉不错。也许对于妈妈，填饱肚子就好了吧！（因为妈妈太饿了。）第一天就这样过去了。

29/05
妈妈似乎对那酒店不大满意，但我却认为还好吧。应该是北京的那“准3星”的酒店惹的祸，把我的水准降到那么低。也难怪妈妈会对那酒店房不满，早上7点窗外就传来pong pong pong的声音，原来窗外那片空地正在盖房子，吵得妈妈无法睡觉，只好要求换房。
接下来的几天，我们住的酒店房不是这里坏，就是那里漏水。但是妈妈也似乎认命了，也不再要求些什么了。
我们这天没去那里，只带妈妈来我的宿舍。妈妈似乎很喜欢我的房，已来到我的宿舍房就倒在床上抱头大睡，可见我的床很不错吧！:)

30/05我的很厉害又独立的妈妈独自去了东湖的磨山，爬上了那个长长的阶梯。厉害吧！

01/05
五一黄金周真的，真的不应该在中国出门。宅在家里是个非常好的选择。
但这天，我陪着妈妈来到了黄鹤楼！

在暴雨前夕的平

可爱的石头爷爷
历史悠久的黄鹤楼

人人人，挤挤挤。
黄鹤楼是很有文化气息，但令我大开眼界的却是黄鹤楼公园里的人！有些人真的是脸皮够厚，一点公德心也没有。套小女人的两个字：无言。

在黄鹤楼上欣赏着风景

放眼望去，黄鹤楼公园内是蛮美的。但是黄鹤楼公园内却已黄鹤楼公园外的高楼大厦成了强烈的对比。也许，这就是这里所拥有的旧新文化相结合的特殊景象吧。

妈妈与帅帅的岳飞

Tobecontinued...

期待与妈妈武汉之旅2...

2009-04-27T10:36:00.001+08:00

HAPPY BELATED BIRTHDAY CHIAWENFANG!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY GILBERT KHAW! :)

2009-04-20T20:27:00.000+08:00

這一生中，你錯過了什麼？

太太在二十五歲時問丈夫，
丈夫沮喪的回答她：我錯過一個新的工作機會。
三十五歲時，丈夫生氣的告訴她：我剛錯過了一班公車。
四十五歲時，丈夫傷心的說：我錯過與親人見最後一面。
五十五歲時，丈夫失望的回答：我錯過了退休的好時機。
六十五歲時，丈夫匆匆的答說：我錯過了看牙醫的時間。
一如往常的，太太總是回以微笑，而微笑中總帶著落寞。
七十五歲那年，太太不再問先生了，此時，先生正跪坐在病危的太太面前，想起太太每隔一段時間，總要問他的問題，他反過來問太太，而太太的微笑中帶著解脫回答：這一生，我沒有錯過你！

此時，先生早已淚流滿面，原以為兩人可以永遠在一起，所以，終日忙著工作與繁瑣的事，卻從不曾用心體貼朝夕相處的另一半，先生緊抱著太太說：這輩子，我錯過妳五十年來的深情……繁忙的都市裡，有著許多為工作打拚的人，大家總習慣於把工作當成生活的重心，為了滿足社會的價值，不惜出賣自己的時間與身體，捨不得多花時間投資健康，以至於錯過了陪同孩子成長的機會、忽略了身旁關心自己的親友、輕忽了自己的身體。

珍惜，果真要在錯過後才能感受？
沒有人知道明年今日會怎麼？

人世無常，趕緊把握當下，把心中的感激告訴愛你的人、用行動關心你的家人，把每一天都當成人生的最後一段，即使走了，也能讓自己及身旁的人了無遺憾。
我想我或許也有錯過了些什麼，但是要珍惜已擁有的更重要。

2009-04-17T17:08:00.007+08:00

I've been spoiling myself so badly these few days.

Had lunch at Show Coffee and Tea(秀玉餐厅) on 10April.

It's a classy and cool restaurant and the western food there is not bad. It's the ambience there that made me want to go back there again. Cos 8 of us went there tgt, we got this VIP room which is just so comfortable and cosy.

Had dinner at Kurahashi on 11April.

Though we waited for more than 30min before going into the restaurant, everything there is worth the wait. The ambience, food, service... EVERYTHING! :) Love it there!

Had lunch at Kurahashi on 17April. Again.

Along with singyee, zhihui, wanyan, cuishan, qianting, chonglei, jinyu, we marched to Chicony that afternoon to have lunch. It's really sinful and we're all feeling so guilty as we're having this great lunch. Sinful 'cos of the food, guilty 'cos of the fact that we've this essay due on sunday yet we can still so 大摇大摆enjoying our food at this class class restaurant :P

After lunch, chonglei jinyu zhihui singyee and me went for our manicure session! We're all first timer and we walked back and fore in front of the shops for quite some time b4 deciding which one to go into.
ehhh, the first time experience's great! but don't know why i feel damn tired after manicure. Maybe too tense up le. haha! got this gold colour with a flower on every finger! I love the colour! :)

Most importantly, it's cheap!! jus 15RMB for my manicure. where can you find that in Sg!? :D

But of cos, after pampering myself so much, I've to go back to reality. Paid the price when we went back to the hostel. It's like i've to chiong for friday night and the whole of saturday to complete my essay. Glad that I still managed to complete it before the sunday deadline! :) Cheers!

2009-04-13T15:53:00.005+08:00

Ever since I went to beijing, my poor blog is left to rot here.
Assignments are practically piling up skyhigh.

Let's talk about beijing trip.
Wait, settle my grudges first:
From a 3-star hotel to a goingtobe 3-star hotel. W-O-W! Kanna cheated.
Beijing roasted duck to a few tiny slices of don't know what duck. Kanna cheated. (But at least we finally got to eat the REAL Beijing Roasted duck, and yep! we paid for it!)

Right, Beijing trip.
During the beijing trip, we went to 北京天坛, 故宫, 圆明园, 颐和园, 长城, 奥运公园.
Each site we visit, I only have one word to describe: 赶.
The beijing地陪really aren't fantastic at all cos he hardly bothers to explain much about the places we visit. Each time when a explanation is needed, he always uses "你们稍微了解一下就好，反正你们也不了解" to 'cheat' our feelings. It's like what the!
Perhaps to him, we hardly know anything. But that's when he comes in to elaborate and explain on things we don't know, isn't?
I believe a tour guide represents his country. I guess he's just bringing shame to his own country by not doing his duty well. What will others think?

Though I can't say that this trip is fulfilling and satisfying, it's still memorable to 'rush' around in Beijing with friends and classmates.

2009-04-07T23:09:00.004+08:00

一个梦想到底有多伟大？有多了不起？
一旦一个人有了梦想，是不是应该不顾一切去追随那个梦想？

2009-03-31T17:44:00.002+08:00

来到武汉后，总会对着自己想：“千里迢迢来到这里有什么好？”
来了武汉后，就觉得自己身边少了很多东西。
来到武汉后，就必须学会自己生活，学会什么都要靠自己。
来了武汉后，我想我变了。

无依无靠的生活一点都不好受。
没有人倾诉的时候一点也不好受。
今天，心情绷得很紧。

下课时，自己一人踏出教学楼。
武汉秋天的冷风把我冷得牙齿直打架。
也许武汉的秋天就是那么的冷吧，让人忍不住打哆嗦。
这是在新加坡体会不到的。
我身心都觉得好冷，好冷。

武汉让我见识到自认为冬天的秋天的雪，
武汉让我感受到它的刺骨的秋风，
武汉让我领悟到一个人的无奈。

武汉让我领悟到在外独自一人时，什么事也只能靠自己了。
就算有千百个不愿意，但也只能这样吧。

换一个角度想，千里迢迢来到武汉这里，有什么不好？

2009-03-30T19:54:00.002+08:00

There's a bug in my milk tea!!
I feel so damn disgusted now.
o.O

2009-03-28T22:57:00.005+08:00

今天的我们全军覆没。
今天的我们都在汉口的“老鼠街”阵亡了。

I bought that "CUTIE" cap for just 15RMB, Stage tshirt 25RMB(bought one for mel too^^), Mickeymouse blouse 40RMB. :)

这个月下来，我以为自己已经习惯这里的生活。但事实却非如此。

当自己从忙碌中闲下来时就会不知觉地想念家里那熟悉的一切，想念家里的人，想念mel，想念bffl。这是，我的眼泪就会不知不觉地划过我的脸颊。

真希望4月28日的到来，更希望7月5日的来临。

2009-03-25T21:27:00.002+08:00

最近，我不太想说话。
也许是因为我喉咙不舒服，，也许因为我在pms-ing，也许就像芝蕙说我在emo-ing。

最近，我想太多，
明明告诉自己不要在想了，但脑子就是那么不听话，总爱胡思乱想，总爱发白日梦。

最近，我发觉我变了。
变得连我都觉得自己很陌生。想不透到底是哪里变了，也许也许。。有时自己在想太多了。

...15seconds...

:) 自己又再发呆了。

2009-03-23T21:14:00.002+08:00

Today Wuhan is freezing.

Weather for Wuhan, Hubei, China
9°C
Current: Clear
Wind: NE at 6 km/h
Humidity: 82%

Everything's too sudden.

2009-03-20T08:16:00.003+08:00

19march 停电了
Early in the morning, they cut our power supply punctually at 0900h,
promising we will have our power supply back at 1500h.
The funny thing here is if the power supply get cuts off, we will have neither electricity nor water.
So there we are, without electricity nor water.
But we survived.

Not mentioning I took my clothes down to laundry room at 0830h and nobody, not even that security guard who collected that 3yuan from me, told me that the power supply for the whole of west side of the University will be cut off at 0900h.
So my poor clothes, wet and cold, stuck in that washing machine. Poor poor.
When we end lesson at 1730, I rushed back to our dearest hostel hoping to rescue my clothes.

ohmy ohmy.
I was expecting too much.
We waited... and waited... AND WAITED...

1900h the main lights in the lobby's working! The lift is working! So is the washing machine! (My clothes are saved!) Hurray Hurray!
We rushed back to our room, on the switch, TADA! there's light.
But not for long...
In 5minutes, "snap" and the whole room went black!
The light will on and off in every 5minute interval. This went on for at least 3hours. Each time we went to "complain", they kept saying just wait for another hour and things should be fine. I guess too many people complained, till they felt as helpless and we do.

It's like I got shock almost each time the light went out and bacck on again. Felt mentally and physically tired. It's torturing.
Adding on our shock, the tap water seems to be so muddy and murky.Gross! Nothing seems to working. o.O
In the end, I went down to Yiqi and Vina's room to bathe and charge my phone becos their light and power supply seems to be working perfectly well. Thanks so much!~

Finally, by 2300h(or later) i guess, the power supply finally stablised.
Thanks goodness.

2009-03-14T23:32:00.005+08:00

Today, I cried. Again.
The feeling of homesick and those fear and anxiety caused by the rashes on my hands overwhelmed me.

爸妈，对不起。
又让你担心了。
我会努力地熬过这128天，不会荒废我这2年在义安的学习。

芝蕙，谢谢你的安慰和在我肩膀上的pat-pat。
宛燕，谢谢你把笑容带回我的脸上。
馨愉，谢谢你对我的谅解和宽容。
在我身边鼓励我的朋友们(dearest like smallwomen, chongchong, CS mama, qianqian)，谢谢你们。

I don't know if I'll ever get use of living alone.
In this present stage of my life, it's filled with so much uncertainty.
It's scary to take out every step, making every decision myself.
Luckily for me, I'm not alone.

Elf（她叫我那么称呼她。她爱搞神秘。）：既然到了这里，与其怨天尤人，不如去感受、去体验，或许这128天，会是你生命中最快乐的128天。可能不会是你生命中最快乐的128天，可是你不能否认这将是你生命中不可能忘记的128天。

我：这128天很难是我这一生最快乐的128天，但是我会尽量去感受、体会这里的一切。我不知道我会不会想念，但我很肯定地说我不会忘了这128天。

Elf：其实，我觉得身在异乡，可能会辛苦，可是感觉很好。那种可以漫步在校园，然后一起上课，一起奋斗的感觉很棒！假如你以悲观的角度去看，那你所看到的只是黑暗的一面。相反的，如果你乐观一点，你能看到的会是更美好的一面。

我：给我一点，不，给我多一点时间吧！我会尽量去体会你的明白。:)

2009-03-12T22:12:00.004+08:00

Weather for Wuhan, Hubei, China
8°C
Current: Mostly Cloudy
Wind: N at 14 km/h
Humidity: 87%

Truth is always so deceiving.
When everyone thinks that the weather in Wuhan is turning warmer and for the better, we were wrong.
It's chilly out there today and the wind can really numb our face.
After so many years of writing "cold chill ran down my spine", I finally fully understand that phrase. tsk. o.O

I'm missing Singapore.
I'm missing Family.
I'm missing mel.
I'm missing ChiaWenFang.
I'm missing parts and parcel of home.
I'm missing.....
I'm missing.....

Before leaving my warm and cosy home, leaving convenient Singapore, leaving the place I'm familiar with, I always knew there's much more out there in the outside world. But only after I've left my home, left singapore, left the place I'm always familiar with, then I realised how much that's installed for me in that outside world.
As you see, knowledge≠realization.

All I can say, here I am in Wuhan for the rest of 113days. which is less than 4months but more than 3months. Grr..
So, no matter how much I want to be home, want to be back in the place where I'm familiar with, want to be among people whom I'm familiar with, I can't.
So, jiayou ba TASZEMIAN.

Learn to accept and love(though it's quite difficult to understand why people here could smoke in shopping mall when there's a 'no smoking' sign right in front of them) other people's culture, tradition.
Learn to be independent(be it dealing with housework, studies or emotions).
Learn to calm down, THINK and DO instead of crying when challenged by what-so-ever.
Learn to listen instead of yanking out whatever tat's in my mind.
Learn to trust.
Learn to respect.
Learn to think positive.
***(and of cos, I'm now in the process of learning...)

On a lighter note, our Sg tut02 finally had a "class outing?".
It's not exactly a class outing as there're still people missing, but I'm glad we had this dinner tgt today.
It's a new and nice experience for me, eating with people I hardly get to eat with, despite the fact that we were classmates for past 2years. It's heart-warming when we gather ourselves around the round table for that feast! :)
Thanks zhihui wanyan xiaobai CS qianqian chongleii smallwoman NGYIQI dearestvina Ms.Solange Huiwen XiuXiu Shinnnruu Jiale for the wonderful dinner tooday! Cheers! :)
And I can tell you, it's really a feast. 15px and we ordered 17dishes! Woohoo!
Will try to upload some pic-y soon.

希望经过这个全新的体验后的我，能以全新的自我面对人生，面对未来。

2009-03-11T20:01:00.009+08:00

Some photos taken during visit to 湖北省博物馆.

2009-03-07T23:27:00.005+08:00

对于这里的一切，我还在习惯-ing的过程当中。
参观“湖北省博物馆”时拍的。

有了朋友的陪伴，让我在这里的生活更容易过些。

2009-03-04T20:17:00.004+08:00

Weather for Wuhan, Hubei, China on 4march
6°C
Current: Light Rain
Wind: N at 3 km/h
Humidity: 94%

刚察看武汉的气象，发现武汉的天气将有上升的趋势。
可是，今天我的心却像下雪那天一样地冷。

我们俩分隔两地，不知是否自己太敏感，因为总有我们感情逐渐慢慢变淡的感觉。
也许，是我太敏感了。
也许，是我太不讲理了。
也许，我的感觉是对的。

我们就像那首歌的歌词，永远不知道为了什么而争吵，也不知道每一次争吵对彼此带来的伤害。
但是如果我们真的珍惜这段感情，为什么还要争吵而不是为对方着想呢？

我只能说，“对于一切，已经厌倦了。”

伊齐不是说吗，“一段感情最忌讳的就是Silent treatment”。
那Silent Treatment有得医吗？应该没有吧。

也许我想太多了。
他说他不能控制我negative的想法，也觉得说太多一点也没有用，所以任由我想什么都行。
但是他是否知道，我等待的只是他的一句话，一份安慰，一份关心，一份心疼。

也许是我太大意。
他说我忽略了他的感受。
他说我根本不知道他要的是什么。

也许吧。。。思敏是自私的。

好累。
好想家中的每个人。
好想知道他在想什么。

好想哭；
但眼睛好干。

2009-03-03T23:05:00.004+08:00

Ne-Yo - Mad

Oh oh oh, oh oh oh...
Oh oh oh...

[Verse 1]
She's starin' at me,
I'm sittin', wonderin' what she's thinkin'.
Mmmmm
Nobody's talkin',
'Cause talkin' just turns into screamin'.
Ohhh...
And now is I'm yellin' over her,
She's yellin' over me.
All that that means
Is neither of us is listening,
(And what's even worse).
That we don't even remember why were fighting.
So both of us are mad for...

[Hook]
Nothin'
(Fighting for).
Nothin'
(Crying for).
Nothin'
(Whoahhh).
But we won't let it go for
Nothin'
(No not for)
Nothin'.
This should be nothin' to a love like what we got.
Ohhh, baby...

I know sometimes
It's gonna rain...
But baby, can we make up now
'Cause I can't sleep through the pain
(Cant sleep through the pain).

[Chorus]
Girl, I don't wanna go to bed(Mad at you),
And I don't want you to go to bed(Mad at me).
No, I don't wanna go to bed(Mad at you),
And I don't want you to go to bed(Mad at me)
Ohhh no no no...

[Verse 2]
And it gets me upset, girl
When you're constantly accusing.
(Askin' questions like you've already known).
We're fighting this war, baby
When both of us are losing.
(This ain't the way that love is supposed to go).

Whoaaaaaaaaa...
[What happened to workin' it out].
We've falled into this place
Where you ain't backin' down
And I ain't backin' down.
So what the hell do we do now...
It's all for...

[Hook]
Nothin'
(Fighting for).
Nothin'
(Crying for).
Nothin'
(Whoahhh).
But we won't let it go forNothin'
(No not for)
Nothin'.
This should be nothin' to a love like what we got.
Ohhh, baby...

I know sometimes
It's gonna rain...
But baby, can we make up now
'Cause I can't sleep through the pain
(Cant sleep through the pain).

[Chorus]
Girl, I don't wanna go to bed(Mad at you),
And I don't want you to go to bed(Mad at me).
No, I don't wanna go to bed(Mad at you),
And I don't want you to go to bed(Mad at me)
Ohhh no no no...

[Bridge]
Oh baby this love ain't gonna be perfect,
(Perfect, perfect, oh oh).
And just how good it's gonna be.
We can't fuss and we can't fight
Long as everything alright between us
Before we go to sleep.
Baby, we're gonna be happy.
I know sometimes
It's gonna rain...
But baby, can we make up now
'Cause I can't sleep through the pain
(Cant sleep through the pain).

[Chorus]
Girl, I don't wanna go to bed(Mad at you),
And I don't want you to go to bed(Mad at me).
No, I don't wanna go to bed(Mad at you),
And I don't want you to go to bed(Mad at me)
Ohhh no no no...

Song taken from mel's blog.

2009-03-02T19:15:00.009+08:00

Current weather for Wuhan Hubei, China
4°C
Cloudy
Humidity:93%

It's Monday, 02March today.
It snowed.
Since it's my first time seeing snow, i was really excited and busy taking photo all the while when i was waiting for others to gather. Its really like in drama, so romantic lo. seeing those snowflakes floating down. Shheessh. but the aftermath of the snow is terrible.
It wasn't as cold when it's snowing. What's really chilly is when the snow turn into rain. Gosh! So cold lar! freezing every part of me up. Brr..
But i really love the snow! it's b-e-a-u-t-i-f-u-l! wakaka. try to spot for the snowflakes!

Poor leaves suffering in the cold and suppressed by the snow! ROAR :) But aren't that beautiful?

It's more obvious to see those snowflakes on those bikes. Right? Right.

It's aren't as dark as it seems. it's just my flash! *clickclick*

An introduction to my hostel room!
Singyee's and my desk!
My desk.

Our beds.

Right, it's our first lesson in Wuhan. that's our classroom. Guess what, there's no heater in the room or whatever. So i guess almost all of us are freezing on our seats? Lols. it's quite funny to see all of us figeting on our seats but it's not fun at all.

That's my dinner for tonight! Some curry rice thing. Finally had something other than fast food. though it's not very fabulous, but it's enough to make me 满足 :)

2009-02-28T00:49:00.002+08:00

带着大家给予我满满的祝福，我离开了新加坡，来到了武汉。
今天的我，真的飞了。

带着不舍，带着牵挂；
带着泪水，带着期待；
迎接我的是一个新的国家，
一个新的体验，一个新的自我。

坐了4个小时的飞机，抵达了广州国际机场。
在中国的第一个午餐既然是麦当劳。
虽然不能称得上是佳肴，但应付饥饿的我（也没那么夸张啦！）却已足够了。
吃了午餐，我们又起程坐内线的班机到武汉。（又是另外1个多小时的飞机。）
已经坐了一整天的飞机还不够，既然还让我体会到刺骨寒风。*叹*
最后，坐了一个钟头的车后，终于到了华中师范大学。
吃了一段便饭后，走了一段路回宿舍后，冲了一个不大干净的澡后（因为太冷了！），就是我坐在很冷的房间里，敲打着键盘。

晚了。睡觉吧！

4days before immersion trip in china

2009-02-23T23:51:00.003+08:00

在中文系第二年的生涯也算告一段落了吧。
还没来得及休息疲惫的身心，又将开始第三年在中国的浸濡。

还来不及反应；
还来不及说；
还来不及做；
还来不及想。
千千万万的来不及也将成为过去式，
成为心中的另一种遗憾。

虽然说多4天，我就飞了。但还没开始收拾行李的我，真不知从何开始才好。
时间像飞箭一般地飞过，
不知在中国的4.5的岁月是否也一样飞得那么快呢？
而我，经过4.5月在中国的“磨炼”，是否能以一个全新的自我回来新加坡呢？

kiang's birthday

2009-02-15T21:42:00.006+08:00

人生就是那么地无常，不是吗？
当大家都认为这阵风浪已经结束了，
但事实却刚好相反。
现在真的是“一波未平，一波又起”。

昨天，公公仍然能坐在饭桌与家人玩卡，吃晚餐。
今天，他却连说话也有困难。
心痛。无奈
妈妈说，加油吧！我们应该先照顾好自己，
那样才能照顾好公公。*叹气*

On a lighter tone, its kor's birthday today.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY TAWEEKIANG!
又老一岁了。今天辛苦你了。

"Happy birthday"-ing process
taweekiang cake cutting

taweekiang's birthday cake

2009-02-13T22:25:00.013+08:00

Thank you CHIAWENFANG for my first V's day present! haha. sweet! ^^
The chocolate's good!
The rose's tough, it didn't break in my bag.
and the red diary, touches my heart.
Hope in the diary, we'll keep all those memories and friendship in there ba.
We'll xchange it when I come back from china ok :)

We went to this COSY tea place @ Holland V. It's really not bad. The food also not bad. Lols. but don't know is it becos the foods are all fried, now my throat like abit pain. but nvm! everything's worth. able to spend time with chia, talk, LOL tgt, cam whoring but feel so paiseh when soooo many students from dunno where walk by. -tsk! keke.

No matter what, I just want to thnk chia for being able to meet up with me (thanks for your time! :)) before i leave for china. and the first V'sday present! XD

Lemongrass deep fried chicken

Fish N Chip

Our shadow :)

chia with our diaries.

me with our diaries.

2009-02-09T11:30:00.014+08:00

Singapore Flyer!
Just to sit that Singapore Flyer, I stayed up till 1am of sunday morning to finish my part for my marketing presentation on this coming tuesday. belongs to that one of those very rare times where i don't want to do my work last min.
sitting that Singapore Flyer aren't as fun as I thought it'll be. Because I went in the morning, there wasn't much scenery. It like one side is all construction works, another side is all those high-rise building. Only when we look out to the sea, there's something nice to see ba - which is the sea.
The whole ride took around 30mins ba. and i finally confirm that my dad do have 惧高症. but he still pei us go take the ride lo. brave man! Lols.
But in the end, we missed the movie we're supposed to watch.
saddening :(
And sitting the ride makes me abit dizzy. But it's like trapped in a small container like that. So instead of looking out at the "scenery", we end up busy taking footoos` wakaka :)
I still prefer those cable car i took in china. With real scenery, not trapped in the small container, breathing with the wind. tsk~ memories.
though sitting the flyer aren't up to my expectation, at least I'm able to spend some time with my family ba. wakaka! :) Smiles~

Singapore Flyer. sun can kill..

Singapore Flyer Ticket 08/02/09
see that heart?
mom and bro

me!
one of the nicer scenery.
another of the nicer scenery :P
dad and i.

那可少得了财神呢?
My cousin, junqi.
dad and mom.

parent briefing regarding immersion trip

2009-02-06T23:44:00.003+08:00

So tiring.
Just came back from school. Had the briefing with my parents regarding the China Immersion Trip in school just now. It's only after the briefing that makes me realise that omg! time really flies!
It seems like I just entered NP last week and now, in 2weeks time i'll be flying off to China for this 4.5mths immersion trip.
Oh man.
Nervous.
Scare.
Excited.
Going crazy.
Stressed out.
*limited vocabulary*
The moment I stepped home, mom found my passport and ask me to keep it myself. She also passed me a sum of RMB, saying that it's my allowence for the 1stmonth of the trip. Not only that, mom also dig out all those winter clothing and stuff for me. Gosh. Somebody, let time slow down!

Counting down, 20days to Wuhan, Hubei.

hectic last 3weeks

2009-02-05T23:41:00.005+08:00

These few days' really blowing my head off. So many things happening in such a short period of time. But this is only the beginning of the ending. Sounds so chim right? Lols. Actually I can hardly think now le.

Things to be done:
1. Marketing final presentation
2. 争论型呈现
3. Interpretation test
4. Reportage
5. Conlan exam

Just by looking at that list, phew~ cold sweat. Everything so rush, especially when we're having our one and only conlan exam on 23feb, yet flying off to wuhan on the 27feb! So gan. Cheesh! Hope can meet up with the people I wan to meet before flying off! jiayou ba TASZEMIAN!

2009-02-01T19:25:00.003+08:00

TSK! it feels super duper SIANNZ to be sick now! as in TODAY RIGHT NOW THIS MOMENT.
Having this stupid flu and sorethroat, which affects my brain and everyotherparts of my body. really hope this flu bug can shoo shoo away.
It's really damn sianz to know your friends having so much fun yet you cannot join them becos of this BUG! really dampens my mood.
It's really nice of teacher to open up his house for BBQ but it's really damn ****(cannot so vulgur if not ltr zhihui will scold me) that i cant join the rest. tsk. but still hope the rest of you had fun! eat my share? lol.
time flies.
26moredays.
and i will be on my way to china.
26moredays.
and i will start missing everyone, everything and everywhere of s'pore.
26moredays.
though parts of me wish for days to pass by quickly, there's still this voice in me that hope i can freeze time. Brrr......cold.

CNY'09 day2

2009-01-27T23:26:00.007+08:00

CNY Day2: my house.
Liping & I

Weipeng & I

Kwang & I

En & I

Shiling jie & I

Peng, mi, liping, sean

junqi, mi, junping

大年初一CNY'09

2009-01-26T22:37:00.013+08:00

HAPPY LUNAR NEW YEAR!
GongxiGongxi! Finally, it's CNY! Can't say i've helped out much during the preparation for CNY this year, but at least i've tried! I've tried hanging up the curtains (Seriously, it's a chore! ROAR!), i've clean my table and drawers, clean my windows and little things here and there. It's really tiring and i can't help but to pei fu my mom cause she has to do all these every day, every year and she hardly complains. tsk-tsk.
as for the rest, let the fotos talk ba.
Outside ah ma's house: partial cousins photo.

Outside ah ma's house: xiaoying, aiai, jie

Ah ma's house: Shiling jie & I

MY AH GONG! Cool right?!

Once in a blue moon to see the desktop of my sis's table

xiao hei emo-ing.

xiao hei acting cute.

busy da shao chu-ing de mummy难得埋头苦做家务的爸爸

Anyway, really wan to take more more fotos of my family and YOU KNOW WHO. so i can bring to china and emo dere ma. lol. stupid i know~ but still.. haha.

Cheers everyone! happy CNY! :)

Is it wrong of me?

2009-01-23T08:35:00.004+08:00

I don't know what got into me and why am i so damn angry and frustrated. Perhaps it's just like what qianting says, it's my spot that i can't stand people stepping on. Perhaps it's just me, can't stand the feeling of unfairness ba.
I might sound harsh in my tone and words during yesterday's meeting. But all i can say is i'm a straightforward person. So if i'm not happy, i'll just say i'm not happy. I hope if you have anything to say, whether you happy or not, you can just say out. Cos i'm tired of this guessing game le.
算了。即使再耗下去也只是浪费时间而已，不如把精力和时间放在其他更有意义的事情吧！事到如今，我也把我该说的说完了。这是你的人生，因此最终的选择权还是在你手里。加油吧！

blood type

2009-01-21T22:31:00.003+08:00

Apart from all those anger and stuff, I've received my results for my blood test le! I'm A POS! LOL. Shouldn't have go suffer the physical and psychological pain de, but for the sake of 心安, lol. yay yay! don't need change anything or wad. Cheers!~ ^^

fucking pissed with carpark

2009-01-21T21:44:00.004+08:00

WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU??!
Where is your sense of responsibility? Where is your sense of committment? MOST IMPORTANTLY, WHERE THE FUCK ARE YOU?! If you seriously think you can continue doing all these shit and just say sorry at the end of the day, SORRY TO SAY THAT YOUR SORRY DOESN'T TOUCHED MY HEART!
The day before, you knew that we are going to start filming at 5. you PROMISED that you'll reached around 5. so great!
4.30pm, you claimed that you just finish seeing the doctor and was going to go home to put ur medicine before COMING TO MEET US.
6.13pm, you said that you're on your way and if your bus so happens to drive pass, you'll reach school in 30MINS time. WOW! THAT'S QUICK!
7.00pm, I called just to check if you're reaching and what did you say? "oh! i'm nearby the school le BUT I'M STUCK IN THE JAM. don'tknow how long gonna take!" WOW! ISN'T THAT GREAT?
7.03pm, you messaged to inform me that, "oh! i got to leave early later yea? i need to go hospital visit visit."
8.12pm, you messaged me AGAIN just to inform me YOU'RE IN SCHOOL NOW but are leaving in 15min time becos your soandso is coming to fetch you to hospital so YOU DON'T THINK YOU'RE COMING TO MEET US! SOOOOOOO SORRY!
Yes i'm fucking pissed now. and yes! it's because of you. so let's see how's your explanation after lesson tmr. you said you'll make up for what you've done(if that's what you meant), and you'll do as i said(i'll try to believe you, though it's fucking difficult), i'm looking forward as to how you're going to make up for all these.
Seriously, if you could just step in for that fucking 15mins, i won't have anything to say! could you please explain why you can't even spare that 15min for us?
Comeon! I'M SO SORRY wont get you anywhere in this fucking society so why the fuck should i care about your sorry? and for goodness sake, i know you know everyone knows that THIS IS NOT YOUR FIRST TIME! and i don't see why everyone else should be working their ass off when you can just get your way around like that.
If anyone is kind enough to tell me what i should do, i'll be darn grateful.
A. Should i just treat that you're invisible and carry on with my life as though nothing happened?
B. Should i just scream everything out the next time i see you?
C. Should we talk things out? If so, how can we go about doing it?(Seriously think that this option wont work.)
Please tell me what i should do. Thankyou.

videop-tiring week

2009-01-20T10:05:00.003+08:00

昨天，我们大家都累了。
加油吧！坚持到底！过了这个礼拜后，大家应该会比较轻松了吧！
虽然昨天在拍摄的过程有些不愉快的经验，但算了吧。忍一时风平浪静，退一步开阔天空。
我同意紟妤所说的一句话：“每个人都得为自己所做的事负责任。”就算你现在能用你撒娇和欺骗的行为混过你现在的生活，但是你还能走多远呢？
每个人在走到生命的某个阶段，必定会停下脚步往后看。希望停下脚步后，在回忆的过程，我你大家都不会发觉自己留下太多的遗憾。

再多38天……

count down to CNY

2009-01-18T23:34:00.001+08:00

YAY! 8MORE DAYS TO CNY! I CAN'T WAIT!

but 40more days to wuhan.

now maodun-ing. -.-

blood test!

2009-01-16T23:05:00.004+08:00

I FINALLY TOOK MY BLOOD TEST TODAY!
and it hurts! ohmymy! seriously, it hurt quite bad. mayb like wad cs said, 是我的心理作用. no matter wad, it still hurts. lol. the person helping me take tat blood test cant find my vein at my ellow bend dere, so he took my blood from my fist. firstly, he tried my left fist. he poke tat needle in but e blood just wont flow out! ohmy, here's the painful part. he tries to find my vein with the needle in my flesh to let my blood flow out. so he twist and turn and twist and turn e needle. HEY! IT'S MY HAND LEH. so pain lar! >.< (xiaonvren still say it wont hurt, only like ant bite. 被骗了. lol. no lar..maybe e person doing for her more skillful, unlike mine. o.O) obviously he still cant let e blood flow out, so he pull out the needle and poke my another fist. then i start to panic. i wonder, "if he keep on cannot find my vein, how many times must he poke me??!" but i'm glad to say, i didn't cry~ LOLS! luckily my blood flow out the first time he tried on my right fist. wohoo~ but now, both my fists hurt. boooohoooo.. after all, the experience isn't tat bad ba, right? :)

silly me

2009-01-15T20:09:00.004+08:00

today, I really pi gu yang lo. stupidly go window update dere jus anyhow click e window update den my touchpad cannot even be used. I as a IT idiot, dun even know wad to do lo. all thanks to CUISHAN! she helped me to figure out wad happen and tell me wad can be done! really many many thanksss! oh ya! need thanks boonpin for lending me his lao shu~ xie la. haha. Finally, CS go for the desperate measure, which is to restore my laptop back to it's original state b4 e update. then, tada! my touchpad can work again! WOOOHOO~

lastwords, dear laptop, though today you gave me a tough time, and i scolded you many times, but i still love you. so please don't break down on me when i'm in china! ILOVEYOU LAPTOP! weeehooo~ ^^

before i forget, HAPPY BIRTHDAY GOH WAN YAN!! SMILEY SMILEY! spend your money wisely~ wakakaka.

*43moredays to go*

2009-01-14T22:45:00.003+08:00

年少轻狂前，什么都不懂，就像温室里的小花。
年少轻狂时，什么都以为自己很懂，就像急着离开鸟窝的小鸟。
年少轻狂后才发现，自己原来什么都不懂什么都不会，但已不像温室里的小花般纯洁，也没有急着离开鸟窝的小鸟那股般的冲劲。最后才发现，自己剩下的就只有遗憾和感叹了。

china immersion trip

2009-01-10T09:41:00.002+08:00

48more days to china.

Last night, i was told that shinru, solange and i will be seperated from our tutorial class to join another lecture class, BECAUSE our class is FULL! Oh boy! what should i do? now, i not only have to adapt to new environment, i'll have to adapt to new people, new working style and so on. not only that, i'll be seperated from my friends my classmates, those people i'm familiar with. this should be the first obstacle i faced while going to china ba. i really hope there's something the teachers could do so that we wont be seperated from our friends~

mom said that once you go out to society, it's like that. you have no choice of being with your friends when you're out at work. i'll just have to face the harsh and reality world ALONE. it sounds bad, right?

little nyonya

2009-01-05T23:11:00.002+08:00

人生不就是这样吗？人生不像连续剧里的那样每次都能以皆大欢喜作为结局，也不像言情小说那样有情人终成眷属（thanks jinyu），但大家还不是都这样活过来了。因为人生有着种种的波折、困扰，人才会向往着“完美”的世界。可没有人生的波折、困扰，又怎能凸显出“完美”世界的好呢？

当然，小女人说得没错。生活已经很艰辛了，有一点开心的事未必不是件好事。如果换个角度想，小娘惹不也是在艰辛的环境下坚持到底？就因为有了艰辛的环境，才促使小娘惹发奋图强，不让那种环境打倒自己。

希望我们到了中国，不会被任何的东西/事物影响我们努力读书，努力吃喝玩乐的兴致！一起加油吧！

happy niu year!

2009-01-01T18:09:00.002+08:00

HAPPY '牛' YEAR, PEOPLE!
May this year be filled with joy, peace, love and success for everyone!

分手后的我

2008-12-20T21:52:00.001+08:00

人的智慧有限，
就算连最好的测量师也无法量度，
对一个人的爱可以有多深。
真至真的要跟对方分别了，
你更会醒觉到，
当天轻易说分手的自己的不自量力……

我不只不自量力，我还一错再错……

感触

2008-12-20T09:20:00.002+08:00

虽然现在是假期，又是佳节的时期，但因为这段时间一直忙进忙出医院，都还没有时间好好地休息。这段时期爷爷进了医院让我突然觉得生命不仅短暂，而且也很脆弱。如果没有好好地珍惜生命，当生命走到了尾声，后悔的只有自己。

虽然我了解生、老、病、死是人生的过程，但是了解并不能接受。爷爷是勇敢的，他知道自己的病情后并没有感到沮丧。相反地，他还能非常开得开地对我说，都活到了这把年纪，如果注定上天要把我带走，我也只好认了。这，让我感触万分。

我觉得，当一位病人是件非常没有尊严的一份差事。当病人进到医院，就不能谈什么尊严了。说难听的，他们要你走东就走东，要你走西就走西。但是，我还是觉得如果是一位好医生，他除了医术高明以外，也应该顾虑到病人和病人家属的感受。举一个例子，这天我和我的妈妈到了某某医院探望我的爷爷，因护士的通知，知道了我爷爷检验报告出来了，但是还需跟诊治医生商量下一步该怎么做。为了等这位“大名鼎鼎”的心脏手术医生，我和妈妈等了至少5个钟头。但是最后他却打来一通电话说不能到了，只能在电话中草草说几句话了事。当时，听电话的爸爸说，他听到那位“大名鼎鼎”的医生旁有小孩子吵闹的声音，他应该是忘了有我们这些苦苦等候他的人的存在。当时那位医生并没有什么解释，只是替我们接通那通电话的护士说是那位医生太忙了，忙着为他人做手术，才不能下来面对面跟我们商量。但请问一位急着替病人做手术的医生能接听电话吗？还能慢条斯理的回答我们的问题吗？这些问题直到现在还是非常困扰我。

primac assignment1

2008-12-11T12:37:00.003+08:00

WOW! the due date of my marketing assignment is tmr! and i'm not even half done? lol. no... not even 1/4 done.

like what zhihui say.. we today all need to chiong like siao.

haha! How exciting can life get? LOL. the thing i look forward most now is MY TERM BREAK! wahahaha.

i cant seems to control myself. especially with the tempting from my bro and my cousins.. why are they so good at tempting me playing dota? oh gosh! sigh. lol. all i can blame is my weak self-control!! argh! hate it man! really hope i can finish my essay by tonite. at least i'll have time to edit tmr morning! woohoo. hope i wont get tempted to play dota tonite!.

yay! finish narrative shooting le!

2008-12-08T20:44:00.003+08:00

好累。终于拍完narrative production了，真的好累。虽然说是拍完了，但是还有后续工作要做。但至少，不用往外跑了。*开心* :)

时间可以改变一切，你相信吗？我相信。。。时间能改变一个人的样貌、一个人的信念、一个人的那颗心、一个人的态度。就连一个人的一举一动都会因为时间而改变。

Prskch presentation2

2008-12-04T14:54:00.004+08:00

没错，我的得失心又发作了。在这次的指导型呈现中，我只得到B喔~。失望失望失望！！老师说我必须改掉习惯在讲话时参杂英语的坏习惯。如果想做得更好，就得克制自己想用英语的欲望。*大大声地叹一口气！*我到底是怎么了？以前在中学的时候，就讨厌学英文，现在来到了中文系却有拼命地用英语。烦！

我觉得我在这次的指导型呈现中，并没有用老师所教的那几个呈现的技巧，而是靠我本身有的“本事”来做这次的呈现。是因为没有时间准备吗？是没有抓到老师所要的吗？是过于自满了吗？应该是吧... 老师说，我有点懒。因为应该在付出那多一点点的努力不要在呈现中参杂英语。我想...我的确是这样。

讨厌现在被功课、被作业、被压力压得喘不过气。讨厌现在被种种的一切绑住的自己。如果可以，就让我抛下这一切，躲在一个完完全全属于自己的世界。

so busy!

2008-12-01T22:08:00.002+08:00

There's only 1word to describe this sem, HECTIC! There are 6assignments due like...next week? lol. it should be alright right? :) LOL. self comfort. >.<

I know i haven been updating my blog. Perhaps just short of things to write ba. lol. i hope can faster get over and done with this sem, yet after this sem, i'll be flying to china for exchange program. oh man! fan nao! hope i'll be able to meet up with my clooosee friends before i fly off!~

I'll miss my family.
I'll miss my darl.
I'll miss my dogg.
I'll miss everyone else who wont be going China with me.
I'll miss local food!
I'll miss my bed.
...i think the list will go on and on.. I CANT STOP!

happy birthday zai

2008-11-29T01:33:00.001+08:00

Happy 18th birthday to my dearest melvin tan :) ROAR! you better appreciate this post.. if not.. XD

shopping with wenfang

2008-11-25T08:11:00.003+08:00

that's right! i went shopping with CHIAWENFANG! we're suppose to shop for stuff for her prom night, but it's me ending up buying and doing the stuff i need to do. many many thankyou thankyou to BBFL for helping me copying the primary 1 words in popular! :) otherwise, i don't know how to handle 40words. hehs~ but heng we never get chase out by the people working in popular, and i think they are too busy to notice us! HOHO~

chiachia, we hardly meetup, hardly chitty chatty on the phone, hardly get to chat online, but i still feels good meeting up with you. we're still able to talk freely, giggle and laugh at the slightest thing, and most of all, u made me miss my past, made me miss the times in secondary school. i'm always the one telling you to look forward and don't let memories get in your way, but hey! u "recalled" the memories back to me again! it's a pity we didn't manage to take any photos, but there'll chance again! let's have our "hotdog date" soon! cheers~!

好久没有这种感觉了..谢谢你..

conlan test

2008-11-18T21:53:00.005+08:00

Today, we had conlan test. Though it's not as bad as i tot it is, but i was really nervous before that. The first time laoshi announced the results, i was rather disappointed that my results not mentioned. after lesson, i got back my results and realised tat i did not bad. (laoshi quite efficient ah!) when i told my mom about it, she said my 得失心太重le. i mean, i studied, worked hard, and the questions are within my expectation. So if i didnt get the results i wan, of cos i'll be very disappointed right? perhaps is my environment, perhaps it's just myself. maybe my 得失心really too重le.

Many times in life, i always think it's important to have aim and motive in life. if not, i'll feel very lost. but perhaps becos of that, i often enforce this "thinking" onto other people without thinking how they felt about it. am i wrong? or is it we just have different mindsets? I'm sorry zai, for always enforcing my thinking onto you. hope u'll understand. i cant jus forgo our r/s jus liddat, afterall, 3yrs aren't a short time at all. i hope you wont give up so easily too k? :)

happy food, happy me

2008-11-16T15:46:00.008+08:00

HAPPY BELATED BIRTHDAY TO XIIAOBAI AND JINYU!

We went to Ding Tai Feng yesterday to "celebrate" Singyee and Jinyu's birthday! Zhihui, Wanyan and I were like so late cause we need to meet up first to wrap presents and write cards. Everything seems so rush. lol. but no matter what, we managed to get settled in in Ding Tai Feng. I love the corner seats, at least it gave us some privacy. but most of all, i love the FOOD! It's been a LONG time since i felt so幸福after eating le. Happy happy :D After eating, we went cine shop shop. walk dao neoprint shop den we suddenly feel like taking neoprints. oh man! i think we all went back into secondary school time le ba. LOL. but it's all good memories, isn't?

cuishan专注地吃着她的猪扒饭.

炸酱面!真的很好吃.

My favourite! 小笼包!

好好吃的猪扒饭.

sick

2008-11-09T19:27:00.014+08:00

could anyone tell me is any holiday or wadeva so ever coming soon? i always have this habit of falling sick whenever it's before holiday or after holiday so that i have a "longer holiday". lol. that's what my mom call "cao geng". but! why am i sick at tis time. damnit. so could anyone tell me any holiday tat i've missed out?

my mom said perhaps it's becos last nite, when i went to a wedding dinner, my body detech wrongly. must be the chemicals in me sooooo hype and happy(cos of the good food), tat gives my body signal to fall sick. is this wad u call 乐极生悲? >.< lol. makes sense yea?

speaking of tat wedding dinner, i wore my sis cocktail gown and a heavy necklace. why would i call it heavy necklace? becos it's really HEAVY! lol. and my sis gave me this pair of cute earring. really nice! the dinner was alright. but we just feel quite awakward. after all, we're distance relatives. ok. whatever it is, at the end of the day, we have a great time taking photos.

my aunt's 全家福.

Don't doubt. yupps. they are brothers. My lovely cousins.

Can you figure out what's that? made by my bro. he's really bored before the dinner starts.

Don't this pair of earring looks cute? :)

despite mom's stare, dad still cant stop himself from drinking. oops.

sis me mom, why do my older sis always looks younger than me?!

bro trying his best to look stern. nice try >.<

never be cheated by tat innocent look! he's not shy at all!

hey hey! we're not here to play piano.

do we really look alike? o.O nvm. i know ur answer.

黑白灰

2008-11-06T21:51:00.004+08:00

小时候，我的世界里只有黑和白、只有是和不是、只有要和不要，一切都是那么的单纯简单。但是，傻傻的我却一直往这个黑白的世界涂上颜色。红色，青色，紫色，蓝色……慢慢地，随着岁月的流逝，我的世界变得越来越缤纷亮丽，我也越来越多顾虑了。顾虑他人对自己的想法，顾虑自己对他人的看法，顾虑自己所作所为是否符合“常人”的作风等等……这样生活，真的会觉得透不过气。

有时，真羡慕那些能实现自己想法的人。就如前几天看到一个关于“虎人”的报道。这位“虎人”为了让自己成为处处都想老虎的人，不停地打造自己，让自己成为一位真正的“虎人”。他的脸受过数次的整容，身体也纹上老虎的线条，为了就是让自己的五官更像老虎。他甚至还把自己的牙齿磨得像老虎的一样。也许，在许多人的眼里，这位“虎人”已经爱虎成痴了，但至少他敢于追寻自己的梦想的人。这也是许多人一辈子都无法做到的事，不是吗？

想回到黑白时代的我………

下雨了

2008-11-05T14:10:00.004+08:00

又下雨了。

I love rainnyyy dayyss..

emo-ing

2008-11-03T23:45:00.003+08:00

People always say my mood changes like the wind. I never wanted to emo suddenly, if you call that emo-ing, it's just that i will have my sudden need for some space. I like to go into my own world of thoughts. I don't know if you call it split personalities or whatsoever, I always believe there's another me in me. And my another me only comes out once in a while. Maybe that's what makes me Gemini. lol.

Gemini symbolises the twins, which gives two personalities in one person. Meaning, Gemini can be irritating and irritable, can be persuasive and can be talking too much, can be obstinate and inconsistent. That's what makes Gemini.

As for me, many of the people around me usually only see me and not another me. So whenever another me decides to show, they will say i emo-ing. lol. esp these few days, i'm undergoing some changes in my life, so i'll tend to get rather emotional.

After saying so much, i'm just finding some lame excuses for myself whenever i drift off into my own thoughts. However, it really doesnt happen often. Sometimes, i just purely don't feel like talking, or sometimes, i just feel the atmosphere is much too hype or tense for me to add in somemore. No matter how much i LOVE to 加油添醋, i still know when to play and when to stop.

So, next time don't say i emo le hao ma? just take it as, i'm having one of my sudden need for some space.

sudden need for some space

2008-11-01T23:11:00.003+08:00

emo-ing.

还是很想你

2008-11-01T00:54:00.008+08:00

今天在你的博客上，似乎读到你说起了我。离开你这一个星期，还是想着你。告诉自己，还会想着你，都因为还没习惯没有你的日子。说我自欺欺人也好，自我催眠也好。

当你说你累了那刻起，我的心也冷了。但是每当我独自走着回家的路时，仍然会往那方向望去，希望能看到你的影子。我错了，因为你的影子已不在了。也许，对你而言，我从没重视你，但事实并非如此。你万万没想到，我的情绪会跟着你的一举一动起伏不定，我的心跳会跟着你每说的一句话跳动。希望你能回到你原来的自己，回到认识我前的自己。

TGIF!

2008-11-01T00:08:00.016+08:00

THANK GOODNESS IT'S FRIDAY! Woohoo! it's friday again! how are you people feeling?

Many thanks to Jinyu, Qianting and CS for being our talents for our continuity video project! yeaps! we've completed shooting our parts le! yay!如释重负! now it's the editing part, which is the worse of the worse, according to what my brother said. :/ i don't know. whatever. since it's not here yet, we shouldn't worry about it right? :) really need to take this weekend to replenish my sleep. argh! my 10pm sleeping time is like gone this whole week! Zzz. anyway. really glad that we completed today's shooting. though still have some tiny winny argues, but things still went quite smoothly right? Cheers team! Today's a long day. After been thru the mental and physical "torture" in the morning, we still have to attend some NP 45th birthday thingy in the evening. HAPPY 45TH BIRTHDAY NP! Actually, qianting, jinyu, cs and i were suppose to be involved in the tree planting thing. which is like end of the event thing. so when we reach the stadium, where the event's held, we hang out awhile with zhihui and guys, seeing them fixing their ERP. it's rather awesome! then, we went up to the seats and "comfortably" sat there waiting for the event to start. but somehow, we were asked to go down to be some last min "extras" as they were short of people holding those cardboard cakes. (tat cardboard cakes are meant to be birthday cake for NP, if you get what i mean.) so, we have to take part in the rehearsal thing, even participating in the event! it's rather awakward u know. becos everything's so unprepared and last min. lol. nevertheless, we tried to 苦中作乐, as usual.

long waits after long waits, tired, sticky, stinky 7little girls wearing HMS bright yellow tshirt. at the end of the performance, we were all tired and stuff. but i believe, it'll be a memorable moment for us. :) look at the hat! qianting was 强烈de抗拒-ing at first. but in the end, i think she 认命le or something, she jus wear lo. look! all the girls look so cute right. cheers!^^

last but not least, we headed to the green mall for buffet dinner! IT'S THE BEST PART OF THE WHOLE EVENT! LOL. u'll see what i mean..

秋的故事

2008-10-30T19:56:00.009+08:00

有位小女孩叫秋，她在家中是老幺，因此从小她就是家中的小霸王，是父母的掌上明珠。秋就是在大家的呵护中长大的。虽然家境不算富裕，但日子还是过得挺富足的。虽然秋没有一双水汪汪的眼睛，没有高高挺挺的鼻子，没有樱桃小嘴，但是她的开朗、活泼的性格深得人心。虽然家中不是非常的富有，但还算富足。过着无忧无虑的小秋，也渐渐地长大了。

逐渐长大的秋，向往自由，就像想要摆脱“温室”的花朵。即使花儿想离开温室，辛辛苦苦刚把花儿栽培到开花的园丁怎么肯呢？秋的父母越管她越严，开始牵涉她的社交圈子，而秋，也越来越叛逆，努力地反抗父母的管制。终于有一天，一切破裂了。秋得到她所要的自由，却失去父母对自己的信任，也伤了身边亲人的心。

从来没有受过任何伤害的花朵在离开自己的温室后，能在这花花世界里生存吗？当秋一点一滴地看清这花花世界时，她怕了。原来，在这现实主义的花花世界里只有一个道理，那就是“适者生存”。没有信任、没有情感，只有自我为中心的心理。再也没有人问秋今天过得如何了，只有秋身边的“朋友”抢着说自己过得如何。慢慢地，秋再也没有小时候的开朗，没有小时候的天真活泼的性格了。她变得越来越沉静，直到有一天她不再说话了。因为，温室里的花儿已经枯了。

虽得到自由，但秋并不快乐。相反地，没了父亲祛寒问暖、没了母亲整天唠叨，秋慌了。她以为没人爱她、疼她了。但秋不知道的是，是她让自己陷入黑暗中，能救自己的也是自己。

秋，傻吗？但我们能怪像她这种傻瓜吗？

Video Production is a chore!

2008-10-28T22:08:00.005+08:00

Videop is a chore! It's really worse than i have imagined it to be. now i know why C.ZH shake her head when i asked her about Videop. You never know what will happen on the day of shooting. anything, ANYTHING can seriously happen. All these setbacks seems to be endless and it keep coming after us again and again. Nevertheless, really thank Singyee's two lovely friends and our dearest jinyu for their help regardless of the situations we're in today! THANKYOU!

Today we had our "actual" shooting for our first video project. BUT! today seems like our sway-est day since school reopen. First, our camera got into some problems and we're like fiddling with the camera and wasted at least 15min? we aren't really taught how to use the WHOLE v.cam. i think we're only taught how to record, stop, adjust the color, audio adjustment. (correct me if i'm wrong.) there're still many things that we don't know about that DEAR V.CAM. perhaps our teacher want use to explore the v.cam ourselves but i really wish to let our dearest teacher know that we could hardly keep up with the time now.

(my heart is beating so fast when i'm typing this post. oh dear, i'm just getting so agitated now. :/)

many thanks to zhihui and wanyan whom send our v.cam to "repair" and somehow, things got corrected and we're supposely going to start filming! BUT! (again.) out of nowhere, this guy pop out and he told us we can't film here without a PERMIT! oh great! this guy told us to get a permit NOW and we can continue film again. so thus, zhihui and wanyan waste no time shooting to the office. however, SINCE WE AREN'T *MS STUDENTS, WE ARE NOT ALLOWED TO GET THE FORM TO FILM AT OUR IDEAL PLACE INSTANTLY. supposely, we were told by our dearest teacher that we don't have to get permit to film in school. perhaps we got the wrong idea. WE DON'T HAVE TO GET PERMIT TO FILM NOT EVERYWHERE IN SCHOOL. but something really bothers me is, are we students who don't pay school fees? why arent we as privileged as some students?? so am i suppose to get the idea that students from different course aren't as privileged as other students? (ok. maybe is i xiao ren, but i seriously think someone sabo us lar. whatever.)

ok. so we sent ourselves out of tat place, kept walking till some not so ideal place. but nvm, i guess since we're *HS, we only can use places without any nice scenery, places that are hot and humid and filled with dust. trouble never stops looking for us. we started having some noise problem thing. there were some construction works going on and we can't really hear what the talents were saying. when everything seems to quieten down, here comes another bunch of kids who treat places around them like playground. if they are really so considerate and not blind, i'm sure they can see that there is this group of people, whom are so desperate for time and working so hard to get their 1st video production go on. yet these kids just continue to have fun in their "playground" and ignore us! great great! so now we have to wait for these kids to quieten down. it seems to be taking forever! becos they seems to be having so much fun with their "slide" and how i wish i could join them. i really thank jinyu, christin and baohui for ur paitence and tolerance with us and everything else.

after all these non-stop trouble, we couldn't finish the shooting. if we couldn't blame all those above for our failure, we could only blame ourselves. we're still rather lack of preparation despite our practice session last friday. there are still many things that we lack in thought of. circumstances happened today really affects our emotions and everythings seems to be in a mess. i believe as a team, we still have many places to improve in such as i should really be clear of the things i'm shooting, zhihui help to take note of the time log, wanyan be fierce and stand out to help us solve problems, singyee taking care of our emotions.. it'll definitely helps alot.

Question: something troubles me is who decides what kind of shot to be used during shooting?

this will definitely be a valuable experience for us and it'll prepared us for bigger production in the coming future. let's jiayou together ba! phew.

我和他遇上瓶颈了

2008-10-28T11:46:00.008+08:00

人与人之间有着不同的感情，有亲情、爱情、友情。但当某某与某某的感情遇上瓶颈时，一切将很难在继续下去。

我和他的感情遇上瓶颈了。对于彼此的一切，也累了。三年的时间，说长不长，说短不短。虽然说在一起三年，但我对他的一切仍然一知半解。我们之间，没有默契、没有了解。对于他的了解，只知道他爱玩线上游戏，爱享受人生。对于我们，也许我们之间的差别太大了吧。我，就像长不大的小孩，永远呆在温室里。我要有目标地过生活。但他，总是那么不受约束。他向往自由，向往没有包袱的日子。

你告诉我，你很累了，不想再吵了。我何尝不是呢？

也许我们不再像往日一样了，从新再来似乎离我们很遥远。想突破那瓶颈，需要我们很多的努力和时间。但，我们真的还能突破这瓶颈吗？

good or bad?

2008-10-27T18:11:00.008+08:00

i think my blogging craze is going downhill soon. but nevertheless, i'm still gonna blog. lol. BECAUSE! it's feels great when people read what you write. (ok, this might not applies to everyone but at least it applies to me!) alright. i know many of u guys will be rolling your eyes till i can see the white and thinking to urself "taszemian's so 虚荣!". lol! i agree! totally. but in nicer words, i just want to share my bloggs with you guys! :) RIGHT?

anyway, just wan to share something here. i watched some hokkien drama with my mom a few days back and something strikes me. in e show, it says about good people who gambles will lose everytime while evil ones will always win. WHY IS THAT SO?

u see, during weekends if my family're rather free, we'll tend to PLAY some card games and a tiny winny bit of money is involved. (AGAIN, WE'RE JUST HAVING FUN!) and it happens that i always lose my tiny winny bit of money to the rest of the people in e family! WHY IS THAT SO? sobs. if i've the choice, i don't really wish to be in the "good people" section.